THE SWAMI OF PASTRAMI[email protected]

The Swami of Pastrami


The local mystic with a big white beard, turban and crystal ball as played by Bob Newman.

Once, the Swami and J.P. got themselves into trouble with the U.S. Postal Service.

Boris S.Wort had stolen the Swami’s magic twinkle dust and J.P. appealed to all Patches Pals to send in their twinkle dust. So hundreds of children packed envelopes with whatever they imagined twinkle dust to resemble.

A few days later, J.P. was called down to the front desk at KIRO. There he was greeted by some disgruntled postal workers who asked “Do you think the Swami has enough twinkle dust yet?”. Evidently, the dust/sand/dirt that the Patches Pals were mailing in was damaging mail sorting equipment. J.P. called off the stunt.


The Swami’s voice sounded eerily like the voice of Santa Claus (also played by Newman), so it’s no coincidence that he never appeared on the show after November.